Not Intent on Arriving

One of the more startling things to happen to us in Rome occurred on our last evening.  I’d been searching for a good (great) pizzeria for a while, but hadn’t been able to find one yet.  I also had to balance the needs to the group (you can read: they were whining about having to walk so much).  At last, success. I found it.

In a tiny little side street of the Trastevere neighborhood lies Dar Poeta, an institution legendary for its pizzas.  The kids were really excited.  They liked the neighborhood and they had begun to embrace the beauty of the Italian pizza.

I’m not a heartless person.  The kids had been walking for the entire day in the 40 degree heat (that’s in Celsius and translates to 104 degrees Fahrenheit) and were beat.  We opted to take a bus.  Once I climbed abroad, I had more proof that the world is a small place.  We ran into this mother and daughter pair from NYC.  They were also going to Dar Poeta and my kids talked with them about the trip.  Maybe the lady’s daughter will do the Experiment the following year!

We followed them because they had eaten at Dar Poeta two nights before.  Of course, we got lost.  In spite of the delay, it was a beautiful evening and I enjoyed walking around the neighborhood (which I think is the prettiest in Rome).  My kids did not appreciate it though.

Finally, we arrived.  The kids were ready to mutiny at this point. After bidding goodbye to our American friends, we waited outside while a couple of waiters got the restaurant ready. They took us down to this little prison— err… room.  See below.

This is the entire size of the room.  You can see both sides of the room easily in the picture.  The length was probably 20 feet, if I’m feeling really generous today.  Nevertheless, the 13 of us headed down there happily, ready to enjoy a delicious pizza.

Soon after that, a family of 7 Italian people came down.  There were two kids that are about 7 years old, two teenagers, two men that are about 50 and one woman who appears to be the matriarch of this group.  She noticed us right away and began to give us dirty looks.

I’d like to clarify something.  If you put 20 people in a tiny, tiny room it is impossible that it will not sound a bit noisy.  We were not speaking loudly.  This family looked very unhappy and almost appeared not to be speaking amongst themselves. I’m not sure what was up with them, but the mother continued to get increasingly angry.

I could see her glares getting more and more cold.  I asked the kids to keep it down (they were speaking with normal tones of voice).  Nevertheless, we quieted down to about a whisper.  Again, she gave us the looks of death.  As a good faith gesture, I asked the kids to simmer down a bit.  She said, “thh-aaaa-nk eww” in her extremely broken English (the family must not have spoken any).

We continued this way for the entire meal.  It was a showdown.  I got a bit angry at the kids once because I thought they’d been mocking the woman.  They weren’t, but were bopping their heads and it looked bad.  I felt like we were going to trade blows before the tables, but eventually things ended.

As we walked out, I said to the woman “Lei è così maleducata” (you are extremely rude).  She glared at me probably realizing for the first time that I could understand all she said, and we marched off.  I felt like I got the last word in.

Then, two of my kids forgot a water bottle and had to return.  It was an uncomfortable experience for them, but everyone ultimately survived.  It provided the perfect opportunity to demonstrate that crazy and rude people exist in every culture.  We had a nice discussion about tolerance and cultural differences on a side street in Trastevere.  Not a bad place to have that discussion.

What’s the best way to introduce a bunch of high schoolers to a culture they know nothing about in a language they don’t speak?  Make them do a scavenger hunt all over the city in small groups without me!  Right, that is what you were all thinking I’m sure.

Our first full day in Rome got off to a quick start.  The morning saw us doing a bunch of awesome tourist sites like the monument to Vittorio Emanuele II and the Colosseum.  The tour was fun and I took my kids to lunch up the hill from the Colosseum in a local University eatery.  We got a good deal and the kids got to try Italian pizza for the first time.  The first group picture (seen below) was also captured in the shadow of one of the wonders of the world.

First group picture— Outside of the Colosseum

After lunch I made the kids write the group constitution, which outlined all of the rules we would follow over the course of our five weeks together.  I assumed I would have to prod the kids to include everything, but they blew me away and wrote an amazing document.  Certain obvious rules were included (no hooking up with host siblings, no tattoos and no alcohol except for cultural events), but included others that I didn’t expect they would (no destruction of private property, ensure your behavior creates a positive impression of Americans).  It was pretty awesome.  Also included were some group rules like “a different flavor of gelato must be eaten every night” and “there must be one poker night each week” and “tag must be played on all suitable nights.”  I also stoked some fires and proposed “California Gurls” as the theme song.  Some people had never heard it!  That was remedied right away.

I divided my large group of kids into small groups, gave them a map of the city and gave them a meeting spot (in the beautiful Trastevere neighborhood).  They had a list of 10 tasks to complete within four hours.  The most successful group got to select the restaurant for the evening.  Some of the tasks were basic and boring (but necessary).  These included buying a postcard to send home (with stamps) and purchasing a phone card.  Then, there were more interesting ones.  I had the kids try expresso (a failed experiment for some of them), interview a storekeeper in Piazza della Republicca and, most hilariously, get their picture taken with nuns.  They would kill me if they knew how quickly and randomly these lists were put together.  We had gone over basic vocabulary in the Paris airport, but on the whole they knew very little vocabulary. What an adventure.  I gave the kids the meeting point (see below) and set off by myself.

Part of this is making the kids realize that they can survive even when they don’t speak the language.  They realized then that struggling is part of the experience and, in reality, part of the fun.  The groups came back with some hilarious stories. We learned of Travis’ hilarious first reaction to expresso (“why would anyone drink that stuff man?”), heard about the kids who summoned the courage to interview a couple walking through Piazza della Republicca only to find that they were Australians.  Most hilarious, however, was the story of Kelly’s group.  They struggled to find nuns with whom they could take pictures.

As they were about to give up, they spotted a group of three nuns from across the park.  They ran across the ground, and sprung out of the bushes almost on top of the nuns.  The sisters, though startled, could say nothing as the group pulled out the camera, flashed a quick shot and dashed away laughing.

As we waited, I sent some of the groups to find stamps for the postcards they bought.  They went in and asked the shopkeeper if he had stamps for the USA and he replied “no.”  When I went in and asked, however, he said he did.  When I returned with the same kids, he said that he had stamps, but that they weren’t for the USA.  Some quick dancing from one lying shopkeeper.  Typical Italian reaction.

In short, this first day stripped the kids of their comfort zones right away and gave us some pretty hilarious stories to include the first ever group journal entry!  So to paraphrase liberally from the B-52’s song the kids had to Rome…whether or not they wanted to.   I think they passed their first test with flying colors though.

I’m back in the USA at the end of one of the wildest, most rewarding adventures of my life.  Unfortunately, I didn’t have reliable internet access for most of the time I was in Italy, so I fell behind on updating this site.  I’d like to remedy that.  Starting today and continuing for a while (until I run out of stories), I’ll be posting a random collection of stories from these past five weeks. I hope you enjoy them as much I enjoyed living them.

First a brief sketch of my group.  Before I started out on this trip, my friends had all freaked me out with the idea of dealing with 12 high schoolers.  People warned of all sort of things. “What if they drink and pass out in the middle of the night in Rome?” “What if one of your girls has sex with her host brother and comes home pregnant?”  “What if someone gets a tattoo from a dirty needle and gets AIDS?”  All of these things have occurred on past Experiment trips.

Not gonna lie.  I was a bit freaked out going into this.  During orientation we got a lot of our questions answered, but I still had lingering questions.  Oh well, we were off to the airport.  I gradually met 11/12 of my group.  One of the girls, named Georgia, was already in Italy and would meet up with us in Rome.  To show the group that we were not complete I bought a frisbee, which we named Georgia in honor of our missing member.

Georgia, our answer to Tom Hanks' Wilson

The kids jumped on board with it right off the bat.  I had people asking to watch after “Georgia” in the airport and on the flight.  People were inventing details about “her” life and, by the time we arrived in Rome, people really wanted to meet the real thing.

So here’s a quick sketch.  This way you can get to know people as they appear in future stories.

Caitlen— The first member of the group I ever met!  She took her first flight from Pittsburgh that morning to meet me at the airport.  From a small town in Pennsylvania.  A ball of energy that would come to be known as “The Human Garbage Disposal” or “Speedy Gonzales” by various people throughout the trip. Notable for her fight with a waitress in Rome (story to come).

Caitlen or "Speedy Gonzales"

Nolan— From the projects of White Plains, New York.  Actually from a smaller town that keeps the name of White Plains. He has a brother high-ranking in the military and hopes to one day join the service himself.  A very energetic card player, in spite of his lack of success.  Would come to be remembered for his run-ins with authority that would arise later in the trip in memorable places.  Nicknamed affectionately “Guido” in honor of the Jersey Shore.

Nolan or "Guido"

Bajia— Coming to us from Connecticut, Bajia quickly became convinced that I was trying to kill her.  One of the hardest discoveries for her on the first day of the trip was that her Blackberry would not work in Italy.  Later on, she became the “Mom” of the group (for reasons I never really understood she adopted all the other kids).  She dreamt once that I refused to take her to the hospital and was convinced our descent down Mt. Vesuvius was a death walk.

Bajia or "Mom" or "Yale"

Sam— Arriving on the East Coast from Pacifica, California, which I’ve been informed is close to San Francisco, Sam became one of the comedic assets of the group.  Speaking in a monotone (in the best possible way) that didn’t change depending on his emotions, one of the group’s goals became getting Sam to yell.  Eventually, this was achieved.  I called him Eeyore.  His love of monsters was demonstrated by the purchase of a Scooby Doo book in Italian and a Murano ghost bought in Venice.

Sam or "Clark Kent" or "Eeyore"

Grace— Though she was one of the youngest members of the group (her birthday was on the day of our flight home), Grace was one of the tallest people on the trip.  Coming from St. Paul, Minnesota, one of the group’s first challenges was to decipher that mid-west accent (which Grace always denied having).  She would become infamous in the “Nude Train Ride 2010” scandal (more to come).  No matter how mad someone would get, Grace’s smile would cause you to melt.  This earned her the name “G-Smiles.”

Grace or "G-Smiles"

Amanda—The closest the group would have to a southerner, Amanda joined the group from Charlotte, NC.  She brought with her a love of writing and animals, that would cause my heart to race when she pet dogs on the streets of Cortona. With Amanda, I launched the three-week saga of the ATM card that refused to work.  It finished with searching out a Western Union location outside of Naples.  I’m blanking of her nickname right now, but it will come to me.

Amanda or "Amoeba"

Maggie— West Coast represent, now put your hands up.  I don’t know why I pick Maggie for this since both Kelly (coming up) and Sam come from there as well, but there.  Maggie comes from Seattle and offered a quiet demeanor but hilarious personality to the group.  She’s an expert in cat impressions and did a wonderful meow.  Another memorable moment came when Lowell was able to get her to scream during a piggy back ride around the piazza in Cortona.  Nickname was “M-quiet.”

Maggie or "M-Quiet"

Lowell— One of the biggest balls of endless energy we had in our very energetic group came from Lowell, who comes from the great state of Maine.  Given his ferocious desire to learn Italian, he made over 300 flashcards during our trip to Cortona, which he studied by the pool.  Also deadly scared of pigeons and dogs (he almost pushed me into the hotel pool in Napoli because a tiny dog barked right behind him).  Benefited from our local rep Enzo’s desire to give wine/ beer to everyone.  Nicknamed “Low” because he loves that song by Flo-Rida (just kidding).

Lowell or "Low"

Kelly— A second young lady from the great western state of Washington.  She entertained the group with dozens of hilarious stories, whether they involved meeting Johnny Depp on the scene of a movie (and not meeting Keira Knightly because she’s a jerk) or fighting of a pedophile priest in her own home. Prone to dropping out of conversations at random because of narcolepsy.  Introduced the group to the amazing phrase (if you don’t want to curse) of “ballsauce.” Nickname also forthcoming.

Kelly

Rob— Another native of White Plains, NY, Rob quickly became the morning ball of energy for the group.  His call of “Good Morning” greeted many of the kids as a wake-up call and worked when he served as God during games of mafia as well.  Also entertained the group with his fear of fish, dogs, train rides and notably heights on Mt. Vesuvius, when the experience had him cursing and naming our guide “Billy Goat.”  Nicknamed C-Didds.

Rob or "C-Didds"

Georgia— The unfortunate recipient of my gift on our last night of Venice.  It was a glass Murano frog, a tradition I started with college friends who visited me in the city.  She arrived in the group late in Rome, but quickly became a presence.  She notably became friends with a 11 or 12-year-old kid in Cortona asking him for a “high five” and was the first to jump off the boat into the “Blue Lagoon” in Cosenza (after me and with Caitlen).  Nicknamed Frisbee for obvious reasons.

Georgia or "Frisbee"

Travis— Last but certainly not least.  Travis arrived the first day on his first ever plane ride from Key West, Florida.  He quickly established himself as having the most amazing but also most creepy laugh.  He also distinguished himself by constantly looking to shop for nice clothes.  He introduced the group (and me) to “street talk” and I learned the phrase (maybe this wasn’t his actually) “that shit’s fire.”  Will win the award for best dressed in the group, if only because all the Italians were obsessed.

Travis or "Travissa" or "Dr. Stracciastrippergucci"

Anthony— I suppose I should include something about the crazy person who was leading these amazing kids all-over the country.  Well at least my nickname.  Over the course of the trip my nickname evolved from “A-dawg” to “Troop Mom” to “Mama Goose.”

me or "A-Dawg" or "Mama Goose"

That’s the basic introduction.  Now you know the basic players of the stories that will be written here over the course of the next month.  I hope you enjoy everything.  Our theme song was “California Gurls.”  I make no apologies.  I may have suggested it.  It may have been the buzzword for “is everything OK in your homestay?”

Have you heard “California Gurls” today?

Since I last wrote, I have been getting quite used to the summer routine of the Calabresi. It’s quite nice down here (even if the temperature yesterday topped 42 Celsius or 107 Fahrenheit. Wow! So hot.

The Italian routine goes something like this. Wake up at 9 if you’re lazy like me (yay 10 hours of sleep), get breakfast, watch some TV (I tend to read or write in my journal), get lunch around 1:30 or 2, maybe decide to leave the house by 5 if you’re lucky, hang out in the piazze, stay out until 12 or 1. On other nights of the week people stay out until 2 or 3 at least.

It’s definitely the adjustment for mot of the people in the group (myself included) who are used to constant contact with the outside world and constantly doing something. But, it’s nice.

On the first day, my guide through this adventure in Cosenza, Maria, took me on this grand tour of the city. For whatever reason, and maybe there is one, people seem to avoid the old part of the city. I, however, think it’s stunning and beautiful. Here’s a photo, sadly not taken by myself. Don’t worry photos will be coming once I successfully find a computer to upload them.

The old city of Cosenza

Here's a view of Cosenza from above

Nights have been filled with family dinners, and big ones at that. The first night I met this family with the cutest 10-year-old daughter I’ve ever seen. She asked me how to say a bunch of things in English including eggplant, toenails and handstand. Very funny. The family itself had the strongest accent I’ve heard for a long time, maybe ever. In Calabrese, especially when they speak in dialect the words are very very short. For example, “vuoi andare al mare oggi” (do you want to go to the beach today?) becomes “vuo anda’ al mar ogg.” It’s very quick and sometimes hard to pick up, but still really fun to hear. I find that I understand at least 95% of what’s being said.

The kids are, in general, doing very well. We had our first group meeting (and only one just as a group) yesterday. We walked around the city and chatted, then the kids had some time to shop. They have some of the normal complaints: too much food, not enough showers, communication difficulties and then some less traditional ones; host siblings making out with their boyfriends/ girlfriends too much, host sisters passing out after passing their exams, and refusal to let them have breakfast. I think, all and all, that things are going well, but we’re visiting everyone over the next couple days (as per program rules) to be sure. In the meantime, they have my number should they ever need it.

Already some of them sound like they have some pretty memorable stories. One of the kids has come across as a huge rapper and has developed legions of fans. His family is extremely kind and welcoming. Another family that I saw yesterday had a father who was off to play in a soccer game and the entire group of grandparents had showed up for the occasion. Still another had a father who worked as a wedding photographer. He showed me some of his pictures that we’re extremely beautiful. Of course we had the mother who teaches English (even if her English isn’t that good) but was reading Hemingway. Quite an odd, but fascinating group of people.

This afternoon we’ll visit the families who live by the ocean. It sounds like some communication issues have arisen out there. We’ll hope to straighten everything out and get the lines of communication open again. If we also happen to find our way to the beach while out there, I wouldn’t object.

As they say in Calabria, Ciao Gioia!

Yesterday, the group endured a lot. It was an incredibly long day of travel. We said goodbye to Sergio (the head of our hostel in Cortona) and quite a character himself around 9 yesterday morning and began a long day of travel. The 3-hour ride down to Rome was uneventful. The station was hot as hot could be. Miserable.

Then, we found out that there was a fire on the line between two stations outside of Rome. As a result all trains were delayed by at least 45 minutes and in most cases an hour. Finally got onto our train about 45 minutes late and began the ride down to Cosenza and the homestay. My car on the train was funny. We had a collection of characters directly out of a mystery story. First, the Italian couple who was coming back from a week of cooking school in Bologna. The lady who did not really know how to use thecell phone but tried anyway. Then, the emo college student who was reading manga and coming back home to the south after attending school up North. The youdng mother, her son, and her sister who had two seats purchased in the car but refused to sit in one. Lastly, superwoman. She was a woman from right outside of Cosenza who spoke in such heavy dialect that no one else in the car could understand her. When the windows wouldn’t open for anyone else, she moved and with one swipe of her mighty arms had opened both of them.

The ride was long and especially hot! My kids were miserable. One was panicking a bit, and I came into check on a group of them and found them in various amounts of undress. Another curveball. Two of my kids had to get off the train about 1 hour before the others. They then couldn’t find their families (even though I was assured they were there), A couple of frantic phone calls and I saw a mother scream across the line. They had finally been reunited.

We finally arrived in Cosenza to a mob of families waiting down the platform for us. I met up with Maria (the local rep) who took me to my familly. They live in this splendid villa in the suburbs of Cosenza. The house is huge and beautiful. This morning we had people come by and cut the lawn. There is a dryer for clothes. It’s not unlike my house at home. Alfredo and Sara (my host mom and dad) are wonderful people and Gisuppe (their son) is a hoot. I really like the scene down here and am quite excited for what the next couple of weeks will bring.

Today is the day of rest and tomorrow we’ll begin our visits to the homes of the students. It’s hot here, but I can’t imagine being anywhere else on Earth. Ci sentiamo presto!